Man, Nurses Can Be Completely Insane

Posted by The *Angriest* Pharmacist as Me being a dick, Stupid People, True Story, Work Sucks

There’s this doctor in my area. We’ll call him Dr. Tom Cruise. He has two offices: one in my town and one in a small town very close. Each office has it’s own phone number. Each office has a different staff. Each office has a different script pad he uses with the respective address/phone number on it. When he is at one office, his Nurse Practioner is at the other…for the most part. They do not accept faxes.

Anyone see where this is going?

I have him in my doctor file twice…once for each office so the address is correct on the patient handout as well as the phone number.

Today, I called for a refill on Ms. Nicole Kidman. I was the same chipper, polite person I always am. I told her what I wanted and gave her the beginning information (name and DOB) and from there I let her take the reigns on what info she wants. My words are in bold as they are more important, and my thoughts/emotions are in [brackets].

Let’s listen in:

“She’s must be patient at our other office. The number there is XXX-XXX-XXXX”

“Ohh, well I’m sorry. The wrong profile for Dr. Cruise must have been selected. I’ll call the other office.”

“Ya know…I don’t understand why this is such an issue all the time. Why don’t you have the right phone number in there?” [I...literally...had NEVER done this before]

“Well, to be honest, I do have the right phone number. I’m trying to get a hold of Dr. Cruise’ office staff, and I was successful. I just happened to have called the wrong office because the wrong doctor was selected when it was filled.” [Dick-Mode on Alert]

“What do you mean wrong doctor? Is she even a patient of Dr. Cruise?”

“Well, of course she is. We just have Dr. Cruise in there twice: once with the office address and phone number you are at and once at the other.” [Dick-Mode on High Alert]

“Well, you need to delete this number then so it doesn’t happen again. She’s not a patient at this office…” [Dick-Mode Activated]

“Do you not see the problem with that? [Long pause to see if she can understand the consequences of those actions...nope!] If I delete your office and number, then the patients that actually go to your office would be screwed for refills because I’d call the OTHER office seeking that refill. Then, I’d be having this pointless conversation with them.”

“Well, I don’t understand why this is such a hard concept.” [Super Dick-Mode Activated]

“It’s not a hard concept. You just aren’t getting it. [BURN] This was a slight mess-up on our part. We just put in the wrong address when we originally filled this prescription. We still had the right doctor…Just the wrong office and phone number.”

“What can you do to see that it doesn’t happen again?” [Ultra Dick-Mode Activated]

“I’ll begin firing techs immediately. Make no mistake - my wrath will be felt. Families will be shattered. The weak shall be crushed by my pestilence.”

*Click*

I guess this Saturday when I play golf with Dr. Cruise, I might include this in our random banter. We’ll see what he thinks I (or he) should do about it.

Who should be firing who here?

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