Aug

Something NEW to gripe about…

Posted by The *Angriest* Pharmacist as Me being a dick, Stupid People, Work Sucks

I’ve never complained about this, and I’m not sure anyone else has either. Regardless, this little thing we deal with every day has really started to irritate me.

Phone systems at doctors offices. Why do I have to call one? For Pete’s sake, get an alternate line that is just an answering machine. Don’t give that number out. Say in the message for pharmacies only. If someone random calls on it, leave it, and laugh!

On top of that, why the fuck does every doctor’s message have to be the same once you get to the pharmacy line?

“This is Peggy at Dr. John Smith’s office. I’m either unavailable, on the line, or away from my desk. If this is an emergency, please hang up, and dial 911. If this is a pharmacy leaving a refill request, please leave the patient’s name, date of birth, doctor’s name, drug name (spelling out any difficult drug names), strength, quantity, sig, last fill, pharmacy name, and call back number. Refills will be processed in 24 to 48 hours. For your convenience, our fax number is XXX-XXX-XXXX. Have a Blessed day.”

Fucking. Crap.

Here’s what I want to hear:
“This is Peggy at Dr. John Smith’s office. Leave me a message with all applicable details. I will get back to you as soon as possible.”

Bada-bing, bada-boom. Short, sweet, and to the point.

One thing I learned quickly, PRESS ONE! Sometimes, you will skip all that bullshit and just hear a beep. You can start talking! Other times, you’re fucked. The retarded message will just start over. Double-hosed…

I’ve been doing this for years. I know what info to leave, you don’t need to tell me what to leave. If someone doesn’t know what info to leave, they really don’t need to be calling…period. You don’t need to tell people to call 911 if there’s an emergency. If I have an emergency, you can guaran-fucking-tee I’m not calling a nurse of all people. I’d hope most people have 911 engrained in their sub-conscious. Hell, I’m sure most babies are born knowing that.

Anyway - all nurses: Fix this shit. I get you off of the phone with me as fast as possible and you make me sift through your stuttering, asinine, commands….fucking weak.

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Kerri says August 8th, 2007 at 1:58 am

My favorites are the ones where you have to press # after ever little entry. Pt name # name of drug # qty # last date # MD name # name of pharmacy # phone of pharmacy # Makes me want to throw the phone accross the room. Just take faxes. End of story

Pharmacy Mike says August 8th, 2007 at 8:28 am

There’s one office in our area that has a joint pharmacy/patient line. The message is literally 5 minutes long. You can start listening to it, put the phone down, walk out, get a cup of coffee, and comeback in plenty of time to leave you 10 second message.

Before the beep, it gives office hours, when the messages will be reviewed and on which days, what patients should do if they need a refill, which drugs the doctor will not refill early under any circumstances, what information should be left on the message by a patient, what information should be left on the message for a pharmacy… And there’s absolutely no way to skip through this message and just get to the beep. AHHHHH

jmerph says August 8th, 2007 at 10:17 am

I hate that too! On the ones where you have to press # after the entries, I am a total bitch. I will leave all the info, press # 5 times and I’m good to go!

knitalot3 says August 8th, 2007 at 4:50 pm

I have been told that due to certain contract requirements, we have to say “If this is an emergency, hang up and dial 911″.

I love the ones with about 10 different levels and choices. Especially when several doc share the same voice mail. “Press 1 for Dr…..’s nurse, Press 2 for Dr…….’s nurse”. Yuck!

rxmeds96 says August 8th, 2007 at 11:37 pm

I agree with Kerri, we have a couple of docs that have the press # after each response. I either call back and hit to get a receptionist or I put as much info as I can on the first one and keep hitting #. What would they do if our phone system had that. Please leave patient name and hit #, what is patient date of birth? press #. No md would ever spend that much time.

The Ole' Apothecary says August 9th, 2007 at 9:22 pm

Most telephone trees will send you to a human if you simply hold down the OPERATOR (”letter O”) key for a second or two.

“Our lives are frittered away by detail—simplify,simplify.” —Henry David Thoreau

jameed says August 10th, 2007 at 11:34 pm

I called a women’s health clinic yesterday. before i could select an option to speak to a humanoid or leave a message to be heard by another humanoid, i had to listen to the complete obstetrics and gynecology chapter from the merck manual (home ed. mind you): “if you did not have a period for….”, “if you are pregnant and you notice spotting,….”, “if you are alone and your water broke,…”

katie says August 11th, 2007 at 9:16 pm

i know the feeling… i spent about 5 minutes navigating through a “press 1 for so-and-so” “press 4 for our fax number” because i was calling a pharmacy in NY from VA, because a patient needed a refill. i think after navigating for so long, and NOT reaching a person or machine, i would have to change doctors if i was a patient