The *Angriest* Pharmacist You want your prescription filled when? Eat shit…

More sins? What's next – cheap prescriptions?

In case you were unsure beforehand, you *are* going to hell. The Vatican just solidified that in stone by adding a few new sins.

• Environmental pollution
• Genetic manipulation
• Accumulating excessive wealth
• Inflicting poverty
• Drug trafficking and consumption
• Morally debatable experiments

Let's talk about them for a second. Environmental pollution -- new age sinning created just for those of us in the 21st century. Gideon's Bibles anyone? What about making birth control "wrong" as the church has done? Doesn't that contribute to overcrowding and pollution? Sure it does. I wonder if burning witches contributed any to the greenhouse effect? Heck, it could be the cause! Witches in the atmosphere could be what Al Gore is trying to expose here...

Genetic manipulation -- this is a load of bullshit. I wonder if monoclonal antibodies fit in here? What about the cancer that God allowed someone to get? It's a manipulation of a gene. Is someone that gets cancer a sinner - or is just the cancer going to hell? What about the delicious corn I had for dinner last night? It was manipulated to grow bigger, faster, and more delicious. Is the corn a sinner, or am I a sinner for eating it?

Accumulating excessive wealth -- wow. "Don't get money, but if you have it, go ahead and give 10% to the church and we'll absolve you." Holy shit - what if someone wins a lottery? What about a high stakes bingo game? -- that the church held? Michael Jordan is a sinner for being loaded - just because we paid him to put a ball through a hoop...What about Bill and Melinda Gates -- arguably the most generous donators of all time (Microsoft stuff withstanding). What about me? I make a healthy wage - some would call it excessive. It's obviously more than I need because others have less and do fine. Of course, we knew I was going to hell. I wonder what the GDP of Vatican City is...

Inflicting poverty -- I'm not even going to list the number of people this makes a sinner...including the church. Of course, they've helped billions...but how many fathers died in the Crusades (any of them) leaving wife and son in poverty and/or servitude? What about me - having to charge hundreds of dollars to a patient for lifesaving therapy? Or the drug company charging my wholesaler an arm an a leg for that drug? Or even the PBMs gobbling up all the profits from every direction and, in a way, making us all just a little bit poorer?

Drug trafficking and consumption -- I looked this one up for clarification. It includes consuming any drug that has a mind altering affect. You've got to be fucking kidding me? Not only is every person in America a sinner, I am the Harbringer of Death. Alcohol, caffeine, Xanax, opiates, Barbiturates -- if it breaks the blood-brain-barriers, the Vatican says, "NO!" And trafficking? Again - talk about pointing a finger directly at me...SHIT! Next point - let's make alcohol a sin, but continue to gobble it up during service, at the beer wagon during the school carnival, and any other time we see fit. It's only a sin if you drink more than the Catholics do...if you drink less than they do, you are a pussy.

Morally debatable experiments -- Whoa. Think about all the pertinent medical research that won't get done now because some zealot sitting on an IRB will read too much into this, consider risks more than benefits, or just not even listen at all (as Christians are so good at doing). Now, I'm not defending research that consists of "let's stop this heparin drip and see how long it takes a clot to develop in various patients" -- I'm defending research that I don't understand, know that's going on, or may/may not involve some part of a zygote (don't even type the fucking word fetus on my website - I'll snap. Fetus = 8 weeks+ Which is why I could care less about dispensing Plan B...) Regardless -- this is going harm medical advancement for the years to come. I wonder if this refers to private bedroom experimentation between the sexes? I mean, come on...we've all *ahem* Nevermind. Let's just say that this may be targeting certain sexual preferences...not like the church would ever do that....would they?

Overall, I feel cheated that I have more ways to sin and find my way into Hell than those born in the 19th century. Why do those horse riding fools have a better chance than me of getting into heaven? Bogus. More importantly, can I get any ex post facto leniency here? Doubtful. I've got all kinds of purgatory headed my way -- don't I?

NOTE: Before commenting, read the URL of this website.
NOTE 2: If you post one fucking word about the prescence or absence of an almighty, I will be the one doing the smiting. I'm not looking for theological discussion on this site. I just merely wanted to bitch a little about these new rules some people have to play by that don't make and damn sense, are somewhat hypocritical, and don't apply to me cause I don't give a rat's ass.

Thundercats are go...