Jan
TAestP is a HERO!
Posted by The *Angriest* Pharmacist as Doctors, Hospital Pharmacy, Stupid Nurses, True Story, Work Sucks
That’s right. Today, I lept from the world of pharmacy into the area of HERO.
I was at the hospital — doing a little bit of ‘consulting.’ I decided to have a little bit of lunch. Of course, TAestP is a loser (and rejected by physicians) so he eats lunch alone.
As I was sitting in the quaint, 80-bed hospital lunch room, I saw the man sitting adjacent to me clutch his chest. He let out a resounding, “HRRRPMPHH!” I assumed he was having a heart attack as he was around 1-ton, eating a cheeseburger, and “HRMPH” is the requisite M.I. sound.
He fell to the ground like a rotten bag of potatoes. It was much to sudden to be an MI. It appeared more like he was having a seizure to me. A heart attack this was not…
I considered laughing (on the inside, I did). Instead, I lept into action. I went to his side, and I did the only thing I could think of. I mean, I’m not an emergency medicine physician. I pointed at some random nurse and instructed him to go and get me the AED.
I pounded my fist onto his chest as hard as I was able. That’s right. I performed a precordial thump. He may not have been in cardiac arrest. He could have really been having a seizure.
I contend that he would have been happy with my efforts — if it would have cost him a few broken ribs. Well, it turns out I did the right thing. He was going into ventricular tachycardia, and my little “5-10 joule” thump knocked him right out of it without the assistance of an AED — but I did break a rib. He was 60+ years old. That fucking guy is lucky that I didn’t crush him like a bag of Doritos as I was much larger than him…
Nonetheless, I am a hero. The hospital is going to give me a plaque. The newspaper is planning a story. I’m a big deal…
“I assumed he was having a heart attack as he was around 1-ton”
“lucky that I didn’t crush him like a bag of Doritos as I was much larger than him…”
That would mean you weigh…………
He was short and fat. I am big, strong, and fit….and I wrote this whilst incredibly drunk…:-)
If you’re mentioning something in a newspaper, be sure to open up the field to other heroes that might recognize the signs of impending collapse, …and advocate the new AHA CPR guiidelines…. Good job! (What’s with all these reputable pharmacists that keep hitting the bottle?)
“big strong and fit”. and a Hero! .ooohh mmmmm
Pharmacy Chick would love to see you!
WAY TO GO!
Imagine Christian Bale in a amoxicillin/coal tar covered labcoat.
Oh, thats not nice, even if its only half true,PC needs a cold shower…
I didn’t know they even taught the Thump anymore. We didn’t get it in our class. congrats on giving a man more days above the dirt.
I’ve seen that precordial thump actually work once – I doubt I could thump anyone hard enough to help. You are a hero. Maybe the docs will eat lunch with you now…
OK let me try that again so it makes sense: So if i understand this right, if we can find the article via google news the identity of TAestP’s will be revealed.
Good luck. I doubt this small town newspaper is online…
Good job! I am glad he had a Pharmacist like you sitting right there. (I know of some who would not know what to do:))
Doesn’t it make you feel good to help somebody like that?
Congrats! That’s really amazing.
I have a question though. Where you trained in performing the “thump” or did you just give it a shot?
Either way, TAestP is indeed a hero!
-Richard
They don’t teach it anymore, but I did learn it when researching arrythmias for some stuff at the hospital.
sooo…. now all we have to do is google to find this story in a newspaper and we will have revealed the true identity of TAestP?!?!
Go for it…there’s no way the small town newspaper is on the internet.
Rizzo beat me to it.
There goes your anonymity.
Congrats.
For some reason the sound/feeling of cracking ribs from chest compressions still haunts me. It just isn’t something you get used to.
LOL on wiki it says some stuff along the lines of not to peform it if untrained and some other details about incorrect technique
Yeah…I’m untrained and did it wrong…but it worked. The guy signed a waiver and I got a hug from his daughter later in the day…
I dunno TAestP… my home town is just over 1000 people and our paper is online.
And with you last line I immediately had visions of Anchorman hehe
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Oh, gimme a break. It was a precordial Heimlich maneuver. How far did the special sauce fly?
No, seriously, congratulations. As my Aussie friend would say, you must feel thoroughly chuffed.
Oh come on, those of us over the age of 40 who grew up watching “Emergency!” know how to do the precordial thump. Johnny and Roy taught us (although I thought it was no longer in favour unless the event is witnessed, which in this case it was. So like, cool!) I have a new mental image of you — a 1970’s era Randolph Mantooth.
Forty? How old do you think I am?
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