The *Angriest* Pharmacist You want your prescription filled when? Eat shit…

Proving the Public is Clueless

I got this from Pharmacy Chick. I'm not sure who this motherfucker is that sent this to her, but his name is Scott. I hope he gets a case of malignant hyperthermia and his "medication vending machine" didn't know what he (or his doctor) wanted and instead of spitting out numerous bottles of dantrolene spits out a few aspirin and a cyclobenzaprine.

"I've been reading your blog and you seem to be upset when people treat you no better than a cashier at Walmart. To top it off, you compare what you do for a living (counting pills and dropping them in a bottle) with the work of skilled trades like carpenters, electricians, and plumbers who work on your house.

Let's face it: You work behind a counter in a retail store, you hand things that you didn't build or produce to people and then you take their money. Why would you expect people (customers) to treat you any differently than a Walmart cashier?

Yes, you may have invested $150,000 more in your schooling than the person wearing the Walmart smock but what else separates you? Why should customers treat you like a deity?

By your own admission, you draw a pretty serious salary. I think you should just cash your humongous paychecks and try to give people the service they think they want or deserve. You are not a wise old doctor who is treating a patient. You are simply counting 100 pills (which you did not invent or manufacture) and putting them in a plastic bottle.

I have seen "medication vending machines" in the lobby of hospital emergency departments. I can't wait for the day when these automatic dispensing machines are available in every supermarket. I don't need to talk to someone who went to college for eight years just to get another thirty days worth of a medication I've been taking for years. I want to put my credit card in a machine, press a few buttons and have my prescription drop into a chute.

I get nearly all of my refills via Medco (mail order). I like using my PC to order medication refills in the middle of the night and then seeing the meds in my mailbox in a few days. I don't need someone who is making $150,000/yr to put three Advair 100/50's in an envelope and mail them to me. Some college kid getting $12/hour can do that. I can't stand going to Walgreens and being told "you have to wait for the pharmacist to come over and talk to you before you can leave the store with your new prescription." Why doesn't that rule apply when I purchase meds through Medco?

I'm sorry that customers treat you like dirt. But look at the scene from my side of the counter: You are handing a product over the counter and taking money from the customer. In the customer's mind, you are not very much different than a cashier at Walmart or the college kid working the cash register at a gas station."

Now that he's had his 2 cents (which I wouldn't pay him for), I get mine -- which is worth $55/hr. Advair eh? Who are you going to call when you get a white growth in your mouth that tastes horrendous? I sincerely hope you call the college student. He's going to laugh and ask for a picture to put on Collegehumor. He's not going to tell you that it's a fungal infection, because he didn't go to college and learn that inhaled steroids, like the one in your Advair can do that.

Your Medco scripts are reviewed by a pharmacist. If there are any problems (i.e. drug interactions), I guarantee that you and your doctor will be notified. You aren't "counseled" because a ton of literature is included, and they give a phone number...Legal obligations covered.

Do you have kids? Sick kid at 11pm. Better give the ole' vending machine a call and see what he says to give your 6 month old for a bad cough and high fever. Ask it for the dosing as well...some parents have been killing their kids by OD'ing them on antihistamines. Make sure it double checks the calculations. Or, there's a 24-hr Walgreens around the corner. The pharmacist may be asleep or watching a movie, but if you wake him up or get his attention, he'll be glad to help.

You're right in accessing our knowledge versus carpenters, electricians, mechanics or other trades. They have vast knowledge. I planned on doing a post on this in the future, but I'll address it know. If my car is going ca-chunk ca-chunk, I'm fucked. I know nothing about cars. I'm not super handy around the house. I can change a lightbulb, but I probably wouldn't trust myself to hang a ceiling fan. I've just never had to do that stuff before. Here's the thing though, if those things don't get done -- I won't die. If grandma stops taking her Warfarin because she doesn't know what it's for, she will die. I can tell you how the Warfarin works, why it works, what it treats, and most importantly, what OTHER drugs interact with it and could cause problems -- leading to that death thing I was talking about. Let's see an electrician explain what an INR is to a patient.

I paid a lot for my education. Sure, I do my fair share of 'merely putting pills in bottles that I didn't create or manufacture' -- but here's the real bitch of it, I could have. I could have gone into pharmaceutical research and development. Hell, two guys in my class DID! I am just not methodical enough to do that. You are right though, I didn't make those pills -- but here's the real bitch of it, I could have. I spent numerous classes learning aliquots and compounding. I could've made that cream, punched that capsule, or molded that suppository. It's mass produced cheaper and faster than I can do it. Many years ago, everything was made by the pharmacist, much like I could do it now. I just don't make every single product to save my patients money.

Scott, you may not think you need a pharmacist. You may not want the help of the pharmacist. That's fucking fine. We don't want you. As the international representative for all pharmacists, I hereby ban you from ever speaking to a pharmacist for any reason. You cannot ask questions. You cannot ask directions. You cannot ask for a tissue when you have a runny nose. You're officially blacklisted, cunt. To be honest, I'd rather spend my time and effort helping those that want to help themselves and respect my educated opinion.

Next time, if I want your opinion -- I'll head over to the Dairy Queen and see which is better: Chocolate or Strawberry.